finding out that almost all other animals don’t have periods like we do and instead simply reabsorb the egg back into their uterine lining to reuse the nutrients is like finding out the rest of the class has been taking WILDLY easier tests than you for the whole semester
like, hey, cat why don’t you have to use your Cat Dollars to invest in tampons? And cat is just like: fuck that noise, my body is OPTIMAL for not being made of inconvenient nonsense, sucks to be you
wack.
humans: hey, bleeding every month is actually really cumbersome and I lose both valuable nutrients AND fluids I need for survival? What the fuck is up?
evolution: yes, alright, but have you considered this about it? *cartoon blow horn noise*
Human bodies suck for many reasons including but not limited to:
Periods
Bad backs
Permanent breasts that do not leave once baby is weaned
Dangerously large, unprotected, and non retractable male reproductive systems
Huge brain takes up way too much energy gotta eat more sleep less
Baby brain bigger than hips guess birth is life threatening now
Takes like 25 years for big brain to even finish maturing
•Teeth are critical to living, yet not designed to last more than a few years without constant intervention and upkeep, and don’t grow back if this is not accomplished. Also, losing your teeth means the bones in your ear will shift, and your hearing will worsen.
•Breathing, eating, communication all from the same pathway, major choking hazard. Give me a dolphin style breathing tube.
•Most pleasurable nerve endings on the body locating on the filthiest parts of you, guarenteed spread of bacteria.
•knees and shoulders have almost zero capability to heal correctly, once they break, they’re basically broken forever without massive outside influence.
On an evolutionary level having a pet fall asleep on you is pretty crazy, there’s so much trust there it’s like, “hey little animal don’t you know I’m an apex predator? thousands of years of domestication to make you take a nap on me” but also there’s a lot of stupidity there too, like if I play on the computer too long my cat decides to draw first blood on my feet
You’re only here because some ancient farmers let your ancestors eat the mice in their grain stores
This post is picking up notes again so here’s more of Malo being the 😜 emoji
Sometimes he just forgets to put his tongue away when he’s cleaning himself
hi…i just have to say if you’re questioning your gender and you think you might be trans but you’re a gay guy/lesbian and you feel like transing your gender is some sort of betrayal to the gay community well just know that it’s not. you are who you are, i know it’s hard to go from thinking you’re gay all your life to realizing you may be straight but, but it’s okay. being straight isn’t wrong, you aren’t wrong for loving who you love.. you don’t have to censor and closet yourself to please other people. you deserve to be happy you deserve to be who you are
Not to romanticize on main but there is really something healing about sitting in front of an open window listening to birds and wind chimes and enjoying a natural breeze. It’s like the world is telling you breath
